PLATTSBURGH -- Jennifer Quaglietta-Tomolillo will soon lead a support group for parents who have lost custody of their children to foster care.

"They feel so pressured without help and support, and they give up," said the West Chazy woman, who has for more than a year worked to get her own three children back.

Gabriel Palmer, 15, has already planned activities for Club Teen Scene, the support group for teens with mental illness that she has belonged to for a few years now and is a program of National Alliance on Mental Illness: Champlain Valley (NAMI) in Plattsburgh.

She intends doing more.

"They've given so much to me, I want to give back," she said.

EMPOWERMENT

Personal experience was the motivator for everyone who took part in a recent two-day NAMI support-group-facilitator training at the office on Healey Avenue. Some cope with mental illness; others have loved ones who do so.

"I think that's one of the strengths of this (support group) model," NAMI Executive Director Marguerite Adelman told the trainees. "You are part of the group -- the group knows you'll be sharing with them, too."

NAMI offers myriad support groups that are all based on that same model, one that doesn't involve mental-health professionals except as occasional guest speakers.

"We have to empower ourselves to believe we can learn from ourselves," Adelman said. "The model is about your journey."

A support group's strength is in shared experience and in the employment of different coping mechanisms that help a person through a difficult time.

The NAMI model includes use of the Stages of Emotional Responses, which helps a person recognize that what they are feeling, whether shock or anger, grief or denial, is a natural part of dealing with a catastrophic event. Another tool is problem solving, when the entire group helps one member come up with solutions to one specific issue.

For the most part, keep the focus on the present, Adelman said.

"Now and tomorrow. Therapy is where (people) should be talking about the past."

Always end on a positive note, she continued -- emphasizing the member's personal strengths.