February 17, 2013

Weighing in on Lent

What do 280 and 40 have to do with Gordie? It rhymes, and it has a lot to do with Lent. 

Kaye and I received our ashes Wednesday as we began this most solemn period in our Christian year. It means that between now and Easter, “280, 40 and Gordie” will be my mantra. 

Are you with me on this? My weight on the day I wrote this was 280. If my bathroom scales could talk, I would have heard only a low groan. If the scales had a digital readout, it might have said, “Step off, please. You have exceeded our design limit.” Or the message might have been crasser: “Fat, fat, fat.”

In any case, I get it. Losing weight didn’t work as a New Year’s resolution, so perhaps making a commitment to God and country during the 40 days of Lent can do the trick. I’m willing to give it an honest shot, if you’re willing to lend your good thoughts.

Those who are related to me by blood or marriage are all too familiar with my burgeoning waistline. Friends of this column are also aware of my attempts at weight loss over the years. At 301 pounds, I adopted the low-carb Atkins diet and maintained it for three years. The loss totaled 81 pounds. How did I celebrate? With a pig-out, of course, and many more after that.

Since then, too many snacks, too many heavy desserts and too little resistance have led to what I call creeping calories. From 220 pounds to 280. It’s time for a change. The countdown is on. There is no prize if you can predict how many of those ponderous pounds I can shed between now and the end of Lent, but I’ll be thrilled at any progress at all. Kaye will be thrilled and perhaps you might be pleased by proxy.

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