TO FIND HELP
"Healing After Suicide Loss" will be from noon to 2:45 p.m. Saturday, Nov. 21. The presentation will feature a 90-minute broadcast featuring a diverse panel of survivors and mental-health professionals who will address many issues surrounding suicide. For more information or to register for the event, contact Mary Anne Cox at 563-1141 or e-mail her at survivorconference@gmail.com.

The Survivors of Suicide Loss support group, facilitated by a mental-health professional, is free and open to any adult who has experienced a suicide loss. The first group meeting will be at 7 p.m. Monday, Nov. 16. For further information or to register for the group, contact Cox or e-mail maryannecox.mac@gmail.com.• • • • •

EMERGENCY NUMBERS
If you're considering suicide, you can get help by calling the following numbers:

   For counseling:

Clinton County Mental Health, 565-4060.

Essex County Mental Health Clinic, 873-3670; after-hour emergencies, (888) 854-3773.

Franklin County's North Star Mental Health Services, 483-3261.

   For emotional crises:

The toll-free Clinton County suicide hot line number is (866) 577-3836 or 1-866-5PREVENT. Out-of-county calls are accepted but other options are:

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline, (800) 273-TALK (8255).

The Essex County Mental Health Association Hope Line, (800) 440-8074.

That last number is staffed around the clock, but the phone system handles limited calls. If there's no answer, hang up and try again. Or call 911 or go to your closest emergency room.

PLATTSBURGH — Mary Anne Cox removed a small package of tissues from her purse and gently placed it on the table before her.

It was a small gesture, but one that held a great deal of significance for Nichole Christiansen, who sat next to Cox talking about her experiences as a "suicide survivor."

"I've had loss in my life, both from suicide and from natural causes," she said. "There is always grief involved, but with suicide, you're left with a lot more questioning, a lot more guilt. The healing process takes a lot longer."

Christiansen lost her sister, Katy Llewellyn, who was 24 when she took her own life a year ago in May. It has been a struggle for Christiansen and her family each and every day, but it is a topic she feels needs to be brought out into the open.

"My sister struggled with mental illness most her life," Christiansen said. "She was first diagnosed at age 11, and her last diagnosis was borderline personality disorder.

Survivors, she said, are left to figure out what happened and why, often placing unwarranted blame on themselves.

"You feel alone," she said. "It was a very lonely place. My friends were there to support me, but they didn't understand. My colleagues at work were there but didn't understand.

"Since then, I've learned to connect with others who have had similar experiences, and that has helped keep me afloat."

COMPELLED TO SPEAK
That need for support will be the topic of focus during an upcoming presentation Cox has helped organize for the National Alliance on Mental Illness: Champlain Valley (NAMI: CV). Keynote speaker Deena Giltz McCullough will share her experiences as a survivor.

"It could have been yesterday," she said of that day in May 2005 when her son, Sean, completed suicide at age 17. "I relive that moment just like it was yesterday, the horrid and vivid images. It's nice when people tell me I'm looking good, but it doesn't feel that way inside."

Shortly after Sean's death, Deena realized she needed to speak out, she needed to share her experiences with others.

"It's not an easy thing to talk about," she said as she reached for a tissue herself. "I don't feel great having to talk about it, but I feel compelled to. I need to reach my children and the parents of other children.

"We need to have a truthful and frank conversation in our communities. This is a real problem, but people aren't listening to what the message is."

ALL BOUNDARIES
More than 33,000 people complete suicide across the nation annually and at least four times that many attempt to do so. Nearly 10 percent of all suicides are completed by people who do not have mental illness.

"In Sean's case, he didn't have any warning signs," Deena noted. "He was a young teen who was put in a bad situation that spiraled out of control. As parents, we went through this wondering if there was something we should have done, something we could have done."

"There are no social boundaries," Christiansen added. "Suicide crosses all kinds of boundaries, socio-economic status, races, genders, age.

"People need to know they're not alone. Other people are suffering, as well. As survivors, we need to celebrate the lives of our loved ones and not just focus on their deaths."

"Healing After Suicide Loss," to be held Saturday, Nov. 21, at the Cardinal Lounge in the Angell College Center, Plattsburgh State, was organized by the county's Mobilizing for Action Through Planning and Partnerships Community Education Subcommittee.

Along with NAMI, other organizations involved include Behavioral Health Services North, Clinton County Health Department and Eastern Adirondack Health Care Network.

"I thought it was important to offer something like this to the community," Cox said. "I lost a friend to suicide, and a close friend of mine lost her son to suicide. I have seen how much pain this causes on family and friends.

"But there is still a stigma out there about suicide. This (presentation) is one way we can help educate people to overcome their reluctance to talk about their feelings, their pain."

E-mail Jeff Meyers at: jmeyers@pressrepublican.com